book, life, motherhood, parenting

This. that. and, bat.

Dusts off blog, walks past tumbleweeds.

Wow. It’s been almost two months since I posted here.

I have so much to share. Like how my eldest just turned five. About my travels and how I’ll be in the DC area this weekend (Gaithersburg festival on Saturday at 11:15am and Politics and Prose Sunday at 5pm [come if you’re free!] And I certainly need to devote a post about how I met Levar Burton. Because seriously, that was just:

So yes, lots to share. Lots to write. And yet, today after nearly two months, first things first. Because today I had to face down a bat.

Yes, a bat.

    It was a bit of a rough day. Our upstairs air conditioner decided to call it quits and the repair guy said it might take three days, possibly a week to fix. With 90 degree temps this is decidedly difficult so sitting around in our sweltering house the kiddos looked at me and batted their lashes and asked for milkshakes. But we were out of milkshake making ingredients. So I said lets go to the store and grab the stuff and soak in the air conditioning, the glorious glorious air conditioning. 

    The eldest fell asleep on the way home from our milkshake run and snoozed on the couch. My youngest sat down with a bowl of watermelon and I sat at the kitchen table chatting with one of my best friends about babies and nap schedules when I see something flying. Being that I’m in the kitchen my first thought is this heat is making me hallucinate. Man, heat sucks. Except it starts flying again. Towards me. And I realized, it was a bat. Now granted I was terrified but I got a good look at said bat and it was not a baby fruit bat. This is the bat that beats up sweet baby fruit bats like Stellaluna. It was an enormous beast of a bat aiming itself at me.

    So I screamed, grabbed the kiddo and ducked. And then I told my friend I WILL CALL YOU BACK BECAUSE BAT BUT NO I’M OKAY BUT SERIOUSLY HOLY CRAP BYE. All the while that I’m freaking out, my inside voice is saying Aisha you’re a really big wimp you know that? It’s a bat. Just a bat. So I call animal control who says to me WHY ARE YOU IN THE HOUSE WITH THE BAT?! GET OUT GET OUT GET OUT! 

    So I wake up the sleeping child, grab the screaming child, and get out of the house with the kids and sit on the front steps waiting for animal control and watching the garage I opened to see if the bat would fly out. Sounds simple except I live in the south. And the bat decided to arrive at rush hour so that meant animal control was driving up from downtown stuck in said rush hour with temps peaking at 90 degrees.

    Backtracking to the toddler screaming. I have never heard any of my children scream like this. Not during shots. Not when they’ve fallen from bikes or didn’t want to sleep at night. I’m not sure if it was the bat that terrified me more or the way his screams slammed my heart. He screamed and clung to me like a koala bear who desperately wished he was a baby kangaroo. Meanwhile all I could think  is I am the grown up. I am the adult. That is a great feeling when you’re splurging on shoes off the internet. It’s not so great when there’s a bat roaming the first floor of your home. I was in lock down reading stories to distract second graders while a man with a gun ran through the backwoods of our school. I herded kids from a portable as an active tornado swirled nearby. Moments like these always amaze me because they remind me I’m the adult. That its on me to smile and pretend it’s going to be okay. It’s on me to know what to do. I’ve done it enough times, and even with something as simple as a bat, this fact floors me each and every time.

    After an hour of toasting in the blazing sun, animal control called to say they were pulling up. And then, the bat flew out of the garage. Of course.

    The officer checked anyways. Just incase the bat had a bat family he left behind so the visit was not completely in vain. I also learned a fun fact: Bats have rabies. Not all of them. But according to the CDC the ones who are flying around in the daytime and finding themselves in your house likely are.

    So, in a nutshell, glad the bat is gone. Glad all is well. My two year old is still terrified but I hope his memory is fleeting.

    Also, we had milkshakes with dinner.

    And well, at least it motivated me to write this blogpost! It’s been so so long. I can’t be certain how regular I’ll be, but I have missed this space. It’s nice to be back. Hope all is well with you and yours.

      2 thoughts on “This. that. and, bat.”

      1. Ugh to the bats. At least when my cat would bring them inside, the little dears were so GRATEFUL to be shepherded back outside and away from the murderous kitty that there was no question of hair-tangling/rabies-worrying/toddler-panicking yuckiness!

        It does sound like you adulted like a pro! Yay for mama-toughness!


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