conversations, motherhood

It’s not you, its me. No, really.

Did you get my phone call about dinner?
Yeah! I love Italian!
So you’re coming?
Yeah, I told you I was!
No you didn’t.
Yes I did!
Nope. You didn’t.
I didn’t?
No, you really didn’t. I need a headcount.
Oh- um- yes, coming. Sorry.

Did you get my e-mail? About the recipe?
Yeah- I replied- just make sure to add basil.
You didn’t reply.
I did.
You didn’t.
I did! Checking sent mail. Oh. I didn’t. Sorry.

If you have tried contacting me in the past six months: I’m sorry. 

A very strange thing has been happening post-baby. I get e-mails. I read them. I think about them as I head to bed, composing perfect responses and even nifty quotes to emphasize a point- and then- I believe I sent it off. Likewise, phone messages. I check them. I smile. I tell myself must call her back. and, I wonder how her vacation went. and need to know what she thinks of Mad Men. And then, I believe I called you back. [And lets not get into how many of you are miffed at my lack of replies to texts and cell phone calls because let me tell you that shiny jingly object fascinates my baby and he flips it under sofas and under car seats- and I often don’t find it for weeks on end- and yes I am blaming it on the baby!]

Apparently childbirth has made me think my thoughts are telepathically conveyed to you all. And they’re not. I feel bad. I value you. I care about you. But I forget that I did not respond to you. I believe this has something to do with sleep and the fact that I don’t get any of it. I’m trying to get better about it. I put stars next to e-mails that need replies. I state in my cell phone voice message that I’m bad about answering it thus putting people on notice. I’m working on it. But please don’t give up on me! Because its not you, its me. Really. [And please tell me someone can relate? I’m hoping its not just me.]

8 thoughts on “It’s not you, its me. No, really.”

  1. being out of it is common after a baby. i left my credit card in different stores, forgot to pay my school tuition until a month later, etc, etc. don't worry, it will get better iA:)



  2. I'm scared. I already have pregnancy brain and now I realize it's going to get worse after baby arrives! I'm really in trouble!!!! Pixie


  3. Thanks, Anon, who?? 🙂

    Riz- always a pleasure to hear from you here 🙂 thanks for relating to me- and for understanding 🙂

    Pixie- Mubarak!!! First baby? Oh yes- and I get a lot of “I must go do this” and I have full force energy to go do it, and then halfway there I have no idea why I'm walking so fast and purposefully. It's so weird! Mommy brain is scary.


  4. Aww ur so cute! But as of now, more than relating to you, i can relate to the person who isn't getting hold of you! Who's wondering what happened, and why you haven't called them back in dayss, or replied their emails. Always remember to let them know why and that you do appreciate and value them. Just the way you did on this post. =)


  5. Muslimah- allright allright fair enough!!! 🙂 I feel bad as it is, lol. But our'e right- its important not to let it get too far off.

    Anon 🙂

    Pixie) Mubarak!!!!! 🙂 You need to blog so I can hear all about your pregnancy and baby!


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