humor, school

Wonders never cease**

There is a bird. In my garage. It will not leave. Kashif opened the garage door to leave for work. The car was just sitting there minding its own business. A bird at full speed, as though competing for birdie olympics flew headfirst into the car. Then we thought it left. It did not. It is still there. In my garage. And it will not leave. Both garage doors have been open. For four hours. I check. Its quiet. Then closing the door, thinking its gone, the bird jumps from its hiding and frantically flies around. But. wont. leave. And the bird is bald. And stares at me in a crazy way. Unmoving. Alfred Hitchcock movies come to mind. So I call animal control. Who tell me to call the police. Who tell me someone will be there. When? They do not know. Tonight? Tomorrow? Monday?

So its me and crazy bird. Chilling.

I think I’ll name him Norm.

Did I mention this homeowner is exhausted?

***Update: Animal control came and shooed the bird away. Why do I still feel drained?

23 thoughts on “Wonders never cease**”

  1. Eid mubarak! maybe he was just hoping you’d hook him with a hair piece since Ramadan is down to the wire. Actually in my culture a bird coming into your house/garage etc is a sign of luck. Hmmmm could be no more dishwashers will be attacking you for the rest of the year?

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  2. lol… a hair piece. poor bird. I think it may have suffered a concussion from its crash. And to have run head first into a parked car, he must have not been playing with a full deck to start with. EID MUBARAK TO YOU TOO. PS: I RENTED WATER!!! Shall email you after I watch it!!! 🙂

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  3. Do you know what type of bird it is? In Bdesh it was considered good luck if pigeons make a nest in your house (sign of peace and all).. here in Canada people buy electronic devices so that pigeons do NOT make a nest in their loft (pigeon poo and all that).

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  4. Palwasha pleased to know I have your approval 🙂 Zainab happened to call during my bird debacle. She found my reaction… amusing 🙂Mystic its very sad. the bird was bald because when it hit the wall all its feathers fell of its head. Sigh. 😦Wayfarer, yeah i remember the hole you talked about.. at least its not in your house 🙂Pixie funny you should say that. My brother’s friend had a run in with a bird too. AN OWL flew head first into his CAR. A cute owl..We have a bunch of suicdal birds yesterday! 😦 As for the bird chirping at your window. I read that when they see their reflection they think its someone else. So they eitehr try to court the reflection or they fight the reflection in which case you will see a bird at your window pecking like crazy at it. LOL. Dumb bird! 🙂Mezba it was either a swallow or a sparrow. I could not tell. I want to say a swallow. Do you know your birds? LOL @ the Canada v. Banladesh like/dislike for the pigeon. I don tlike pigeons myself 🙂

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  5. It seems like the poor birdie had been through some trauma…maybe that’s why it just sat and stared..i dunno, but i’d be uneasy too. sorry, didn’t mean to scare ya! did it just fly off when the animal control came to shoo it away?

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  6. Mystic, stars… kya muthlub? I dont know if its that I happen to meet more unexpected ppl/things than others. Maybe I just notice them more 🙂Zehra, I found out it was a gray catbird. And I read that often times if its dark out and light inside they think its a tunnel and fly in to go through the tunnel. To do that they have to get full speed and then they slam into a wall. Thats prob what happened here. The website I found said that the reason it just sat there like that was because basically it had a severe head on collision and was most likely hemmoraghing to death. I felt like crying reading it. It did not fly off when animal control came. It just sat there. But then he did something to startle it and then the bird kind of flew and then with that impetus the bird was flown out of the garage. *sigh* Poor chirree. I feel bad for it now. People still can’t seem to figure out hy *i* was scared of it. I’m not sure either. But it was a big bird!

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  7. every morning when i go to college, and wait for the bus at the bus station, there is a pidgeon who flies in and stands near my feet. i swear its the same one, every morning.

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  8. Anon. mmmmkay. now i’m officiall creeped out. If you see a person going to get their mail and looking frantically around the trees in fear…. you’ll know why now! 🙂Boba. Really? That is so cute. It must like you. I think when animals are drawn to peole in that way it says a great deal of the person who they feel so safe and comofrotable with particularly because animals are innocent and they are very instinctual. You must be a good hearted person mash’allah 🙂 IThe pigeon probably took you to be her pet. lol

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  9. OMG lol, what Boba said has to be the cutest thing 😀 do birds really do that. My cat doesnt feel that way about me. 😦 How sad is that. I even feed her.Khair, Im sure the bird’s ok. They do that sometimes. Sparrows used to fly into our Dining room all the time through an open window. We used to leave the doors open for a few hours and they’d fly back out after a while. Waisey really, why were u scared. how big was it btw?Eid mubarak!

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  10. Sohnii, Eid Mubarak! Girl, everyone is making fun of me for my fear of this bird. But I’m not a total “darr poke” here. It was about a foot big this bird. That’s huge for a bird! Plus the bird had suffered severe injury form its collision so I was worried.1) it was mentally imbalanced and might think I’m dinner.2) If I tried to push it out I might injure it.I thought animal control would examine the bird to see if it was okay. but they didn’t just shooeed it out. 🙂

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  11. Eid Mubarak, Aisha! Don’t worry…everyone has animal problems with their home. For us in Maryland, it’s those pesky deer. Over the summer, I stepped out our door and there was a lovely garden snake waiting right outside our door. I too had problems with animal control…they wanted to charge me for removing an animal that wasn’t even mine! Luckily there was a nice neighbor who came out of nowhere an grabbed it by the neck and threw it down a sewer drain.

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  12. My goodness, between the squirrels, the dishwasher and Norm I can see your exhaustion, lol. We too have spent our time battling our nut hording little friends. However, I never had a dishwasher fall on me. I’ve yanked off a couple of microwaved handles, but not dishwashers, lol!!

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  13. Better in the garage than in the house.My Mom got a cat this past year and the cat is EXCELLENT at catching birds. She brings them in the house and releases them.LOL.

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  14. Christina Eid mubarak to you too!! SNAKE! IT could have been worse for me then :). Hey, I emailed hassan but never herad back… what is your email address? At the time I was curious what goup you went with but now we’ve gone ahead and made our ecision. Just wondering if you have any advice.Mommyblogr, it was an odd occurrance to say the least 🙂Tee, LOL. The cat catches the bird but doenst kill it? Just brings them into the house? Wow that sounds like the theme of a kids book. A cat who doesnt eat birs but wants to befriend them. Remember “anamanicas” the cat sounds like Elvira 🙂 lol

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  15. Aisha – ROFL! I can’t believe you just mentioned Elvira on Animaniacs and just expected I’d know what you were talking about. (And I did.) LMAO.Yeah, the cat doesn’t kill them. It’s more like a game to her and of course she likes to show Mommy her prize… She does, on the other hand, kill and EAT crickets. Crunchy. LOL.

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  16. hahahah why do these freaky things always happen to you? I mean you had to call the police on a bird! Its nice they came though! I called the police once when I locked myself INSIDE my apartment in Chicago (the door wouldnt open from inside with the keys hanging on the outside) and everyone thought I was dumb.

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  17. The 911 operator said it wasn’t a real emergency, and asked me “don’t you have any freinds who can come and open the door?” I was like no, and if you guys don’t come there will be an emergency when some burglar opens the door.

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